Tuesday 4 December 2007

PROPER TURGID

this is the highest new entry: elvis fucking presley with 'an american trilogy'. no, me neither. other notable highest new entries ( read rereleases) include:
-driving home for christmas
-its the most wonderful time of the year
in christmas related news, i no longer have the ability to recognise when christmas decorations have been put up . it took me 2 hours to realise why i was getting pieces of dangling crepe paper stuck in my poor quality beard. i put this down to the council erecting the 'seasons greetings' decoration outside my window in OCTOBER.

LISTEN TO ELVIS HERE PLEASE

seeing as this was a re-release , and im very cynical about the fact that a song that no one i asked seemed to know what it went like.. i refused to listen to this. i simply took the lyrics, and chords, and made something up around this. if anyone can be bothered listening to the original properly and let me know how close i am do so. i opened it up on youtube to watch the video but then got bored and promptly sacked it right off.

seeing as the chart is looking towards the past a lot this time of year, it brings me onto the topic of the song 'heartbroken' by T2 featuring Jodie Aysha. and the subject of bassline niche- the new genre sweeping the nation. having worked in a used car dealership washing cars on the forecourt listening to radio 1 throughout the 'glory days' of uk garage circa '99: dj luck and mc neat, dj pied piper, fucking oxide and neutrino ( IVE JUST BEEN SHOT EVERYONE STOP GETTING SHOT WTF) i fail to see how this differs in anyway, or has developed in this 8 year gap? my other theory is that music trends are gradually turning in on themselves. evidence:

the advent the electro clash scene around 99 - mainly piss poor weak 80's revival. 20 year gap (approximately)

the advent of''nu-rave' - approximately say 15-16 years post the whole original tent, gloves, glowstick, global hypercolour, shamen etc.

So, as you see, revivals are coming in thick and fast at more regular intervals. I am hypothesising the following to occur in the new year:

January 2008
THE RETURN OF NU- RAVE
- 33 1/3 book on the making of Enter Shikari's seminal album 'Ride the Skies',
a brand new Shitdisco retrospective compilation with extensive liner notes and recollections from one of the most scottish ones. New Young Pony Club to reform to play coachella for 14 million dollars. Calvin Harris bankrupts Creation following an ill-advised, poorly selling covers album , the front cover of which features him in drag.

February 2008
THE RETURN OF LEONA LEWIS
"All Tommorows parties are thrilled that Leona Lewis has agreed to put aside their differences to perform her classic album 'Spirit' in its entirety. The album, released in late 2007, shaped an entire generation, and its breathtaking vision and influence has filtered down into so many of the groundbreaking artists we hear today: Rhydian, them two big lads who won tv programs once, Kerry Katona, that one from hollyoaks (any), the one who went out with teddy sheringham and still won, George Bests, menswe@r, north and south ( NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA - NO SWEAT)." TICKETS £25 EXCLUDING BOOKING FEE.STANDING ONLY

ive went off again so im just going ok

7 comments:

Fabian said...

I'm appalled by the lack of imagination of this weeks top 40; surely not all the record companies in the land can be sitting in their office praying their *desperate spray-tanned vixens* / *coma-inducing easy listening faux-Vegas and popular with Mums man with a sharp suit* / *ugly 4-piece northern band whose biggest influence is named as Paul Wellar (not even Style Council)* will grab the top spot come the mass of Christ.

To be fair it's probably still going to be Leona Lewis anyway. If so then surely this is an opportunity to get something a bit of exposure in the pre-madness lull? Where's this years crappy but unexpected surprise (see: Gary Jules)?

I suppose, like a lot of problems in popular music these days, it all goes back to Simon Cowell, and the One True Voice/Girls Aloud war of 2002, which has ruined the xmas number one battle to the extent that apparently it's the number two that's the real point of interest now, even to the bookies.

I've ran out of things to say now, bye.

Fabian said...

Just found out ex-Arab Strap man Malcolm Middleton is 12-1 for the top spot. Is he our Gary Jules? His song is equally poor.

Gregory said...

I think the most interesting shift has been from blue biro, to a black biro.

This displays a fundamental disaffection and disillusionment with the quality of material for projected cover versionings.

Megan said...

that T2 song is fucking amazing.

warren said...

i dont think ive heard it properly unless its been on a mobile phone on the moor. ill give it a proper listen and pass judgement in due course x

Unknown said...

i can't comment on whether your cover resembles the original, but your dissection of the cyclic nature of the music scene is spot on. "ride the skies" is the most ground breaking album i've heard in the last ten years.

Gregory said...

Tony Wilson used to say that music goes in 13-year cycles.

But he's dead now, so what did he know?


Most ground-breaking album I've heard (made) in the last decade is... I don't know. I'll have a think.

I'm going with self-titled by Storm and Stress in the meantime